Divorce Doesn’t Always Have To Be Acrimonious

If you live in Canada, you might be surprised to find out that there is a distinct difference between the Canadian government approach to divorce as a problem and the US approach.

In the US, the government is largely hands off. There are options to have an uncontested divorce in some states, but both parties can expect to be ‘hit’ by lawyer’s crews that will try and get in and create problems with the disposition of the marriage so that both parties need to retain legal counsel.

In Canada, the government has already recognized that if a couple is divorcing under certain conditions, such as no children, there is not a very good reason for either person to get a lawyer to try the case. They therefore have laws in Ontario that allow couples to file for an uncontested divorce- a type of divorce that means that neither of the parties will retain legal counsel because they feel that they can work the details out between them.

Here are some tips that can help you during your time getting divorced in Ontario so that you will not have to end up hiring a lawyer:

Ensure that you follow Canadian law:

To get divorced without lawyers isn’t that difficult. You do need to establish separate lives and document this and move along with your seperate finances. There are also a couple of rules that you will want to read up on at sites like thedivorceangels.com . The better you know the law, the more likely you will end up avoiding having to retain a counsel.

Write down the word ‘Amicable’:

One of the oldest divorce lawyer tricks in the book is to create acrimony among divorcing parties. It won’t help either of you financially, but creating a war does tend to get people to start talking to their lawyers and not each other. In extreme cases, lawyers have been able to facilitate disagreements that stretch out 6 or 7 years, wrecking the lives of both people that were actually trying to get divorced because they didn’t want their life wrecked.

So write down the word ‘amicable’ and put it on your refrigerator or on a wall somewhere. If you can remain amicable during your divorce, you and your spouse can pick up your social lives and start to grow again right away.

Do tell your friends to respect your stance:

One of the most popular divorce games is for people that you grew up with to choose sides and then agitate for you or the other party in your divorce. If you want to locate your true aquaintances during your breakup, you should find the people that say that they like you both and will not actually treat either one of you differently.

Of course your friends will likely be supportive of you, but they too should know that instead of trying to fight each other into submission, your breakup focus is about having each one of you get back into circulation socially without 100 stab wounds in the back. Think back to when you got married. Those people that tried to get you to spend millions on your wedding sometimes don’t see the big picture, which is the less your wedding cost, the more money you will save for your house and your honeymoon. The same thing is true for people that are getting divorced. The more reasonable that you are during your breakup, the more shrill people who advocate a divorce war will seem. The main thing is to let everyone know your stance, together if possible- so that you can defuse any possible situation.

Getting divorced isn’t the easiest thing to do in the world. But if you are in Ontario and would like to focus on getting your social life back together, look into making your divorce uncontested. When you do so, you save a lot of psychic wear and tear on yourself and your former partner.